


Sifting through these wreckage piles

by entwinedloop



Category: Good Girls (TV)
Genre: F/M, Missing Scene, Trauma, hits heavy notes, references to 2x13 the scene and imagery
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-26
Updated: 2020-05-26
Packaged: 2021-03-02 19:20:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,935
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24381961
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/entwinedloop/pseuds/entwinedloop
Summary: 3x10. While talking with Fitzpatrick, Beth admits that “one and done” may not exactly have been the case for her and Rio. Annie and Ruby want to know what that means. Based on Mego42's prompt.
Relationships: Beth Boland/Rio
Comments: 12
Kudos: 66





	Sifting through these wreckage piles

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt: Would loooooove a take on the car ride with Beth, Ruby and Annie after the hitman called Beth out for sleeping with Rio and she admitted to the girls it was more than just the one time.
> 
> This isn’t part of prompt-a-thon cause I didn’t sign up but I was inspired by it so here we are.
> 
> I had written a fic before with a slightly similar premise, set between Ruby and Beth after s2e5 but when I saw this prompt I couldn’t resist writing it. This fic is a stand alone, unconnected to the other one.
> 
> Rated M just in case for subject matter.

“It’s a nasty process.”

With these words, Fitzpatrick put his gun away and he made his way down the road, back to his daughter.

The women kept their eyes on him, as if expecting him to retrace his steps and play out his threat, give them a taste of what he could do. Tension eased slowly from the car but it left behind one very real problem. A problem, they all knew, that just seemed harder and harder to get rid of.

With her eyes on Fitzpatrick, Beth passed the documents to Ruby who set them on her lap. After a moment Ruby picked them up with both hands and started flipping through them, the flapping of the pages filling the silence. “All of that with only receipts to show for it.”

“Great timing too,” Annie crossed her arms. She definitely didn’t plan for this expense. Well, she didn’t plan for most expenses, but the timing was really off, what with her GED test tomorrow. Maybe she could convince Darren to spot her. She didn’t have any other choice.

The car rolled out as Beth drove the car quietly.

“He really just looks like a normal dad,” Annie said, looking out the window at the father and daughter.

Ruby shook her head, looking down. “Occupational therapy, OK, tan," she flipped one page over back and forth, "but I don’t even know what half of this means. Omakase?”

“What’s that?” Annie asked.

“I don’t know now, do I?”

“I’ll take care of it,” Beth said, slowing her car at a yellow light.

Annie felt some relief at that – it was Beth’s mess to clean up – but it didn’t take away her worry completely. She’d been prepping for that test but there was no way that she was ready. She’d just talk with Darren. Fitzpatrick’s words rang in her ears. She was going to give Beth the benefit of the doubt to speak up and defend herself but she wasn’t going to hold her breathe.

Ruby shook her head. “How are you going to do that?”

Beth glanced at the papers Ruby held in her hand. “I’ll convince him.”

Oh, no. She had to have some plan. “How’s that going to work?” She asked. “You’ll take his hand, point it at gangfriend the next time he leaves his house?”

Ruby flipped over another page. “We don’t even know where he lives. Unless...” She added, looking more carefully at the page below her, trailing her finger down the lines.

Annie followed her finger. “I doubt it’s there,” She said.

At Ruby’s comment about where Rio lays his head Beth’s hands tightened slightly on the wheel, but neither Ruby or Annie noticed. Beth pressed the gas and made a right turn.

“Maybe one of us knows,” Annie said, trying to get Beth’s attention, her hands behind Ruby and Beth’s head rest.

“Will you put your seatbelt on?” Beth asked.

“No. Don’t you think you owe us some explanation?”

“What?” Beth asked blankly.

“Oh no. We don’t have this,” Annie held the documents between her fingers before Ruby pulled them away. “And a still-walking, still-vengeance bent gang leader breathing down our necks and you sitting there and saying nothing.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Beth said, looking ahead.

Annie looked at Ruby for help, but Ruby was still leafing through the pages, making faces and guffaws at what she was reading. “He plays what?” She muttered to herself as she dismissed the thought and turned the page over, like she couldn’t put the new information together. Annie wasn’t focused on that.

“Excuse me,” Annie stared at Beth. “For the most part?”

Beth didn’t reply.

“What does that mean?” Annie pushed.

“Not the point,” Ruby said.

“Sure, take her side,” Annie turned to Ruby. “The only reason that we can’t empty our pockets but at least cross our own hitman off our to-do list is because you were doing West Side Story with gangfriend,” she said, targeting her words at Beth. “I mean, jilted lovers?”

What did that even mean?

“I wasn’t doing anything,” Beth said stiffly but Annie recognized the lilt in her voice. She was wavering. Her older sister. The one who walked a straight line. One time was a shock in itself, but-- what had exactly gone on?

“I can’t believe you,” Annie tried to stop herself from raising her voice. Her sister knew better than that. “Him, out of literally anybody you could get busy with-- you get the guy who can off us one by one?!”

Ruby closed the packet of papers and her eyes went to Beth. Finally. Annie closed her mouth, patiently waiting for Ruby to join in. This couldn’t just be her who’s panicking at the fallout of this. This was their lives. It wasn’t just their lives, but they had their kids to think about. Their families.

“A little help here,” She finally blurted as Ruby sat there like a stone.

“What does it matter what happened? We’d still end up here.”

Annie’s hand shot to her chest. “Excuse me, if it were me we wouldn’t hear the end of it. What were you thinking Annie?” Her head tilted to one side. “How did you get yourself in this mess Annie?” Her head tilted to to other side. Her words hurt. She didn’t want to be the screw up. And she wasn’t. But where was her slack when she’d made a mistake?

“Will you wear your seatbelt please?” Beth asked more firmly.

Annie muttered under her breathe as she leaned back and clicked her seat belt in place. “You know I’m right.”

Ruby started giggling in the front.

“What’s so funny?”

“I’m just trying to picture it,” Ruby put her hands together.

Annie fumed in the back. This wasn’t what they needed to be talking about. “What’s so funny?” She repeated her question, irritation lining her words.

Ruby laughed again as she tried to speak. “You and gangfriend,” she said, saying the word gangfriend mockingly. “I don’t see it. Not even in my imagination.”

“Oh, but you see him with miss perfect here?”

Beth focused her eyes on the road, effectively removing herself from the conversation.

But maybe-- “You know!” Annie focused her attention on Ruby.

“I don’t know anything,” Ruby waved her hands in front of her.

That-- actually, that would be likely, Annie thought as she looked at the joggers running past them. When she and Ruby got on the phone she’d tried to prod Ruby for any information. Just a little something. When Beth had confessed that she’d shot Rio. Before that, when she figured out her and gangfriend – but Ruby said Beth didn’t say anything to her she didn’t tell Annie.

She opened her window. It was getting warmer. Maybe she could enjoy it a little. It wasn’t like she was going to study tonight. Maybe her and Ben could watch a movie tonight. Though hopefully he was with friends or he’d make her do something terrible. Like study.

But yeah, when it came to Beth, Ruby and her sister were close but she couldn’t see Beth giving up anything, even to her best friend. Annie’d respect that, in normal circumstances. It’s not like she needed or wanted to hear all the details. Ugh. But what were they going to do? And speaking of her test, how was she going to pass her GED test if she didn’t have money--

Her patience waned as she waited, thinking about the danger Beth was putting them in. She’d be down with Beth getting hot and heavy with anyone, to get out of her funk and to move on from Dean, who’d never deserved her on his best days, but not with someone dangerous who could bite them in the ass – and look at that, it did!

“Beth,” Annie threw her hands up and dropped them beside her, “Say something!”

Beth’s car came to a stop. “Guys, it was just two times.”

Annie inched closer, her movement limited by her seatbelt.

“You’re sure?” Ruby asked.

“That’s not what Mr. Assassin thinks.”

“Who are you going to believe?” Beth asked, moving in her seat. “I’m telling the truth.”

“OK, can you stop driving?” Ruby asked.

“Don’t you think that she’ll just walk out if she stops the car?” Annie asked.

“OK, you know what,” Beth said as she turned to the pavement and parked the car. “All right. You each get one question. That’s it,” She raised her index finger and glanced between Annie and Ruby. Annie turned her face back and forth between the two of them.

One question. Well. A genie may have just jumped out of a magic lamp offering two wishes. Insight into her sister’s perfect life. Though, she supposed, that hadn’t really been true. Anyway. She’d be willing to forgo her wish for the moment. All she really wanted to do was shake her big sister as she asked: “What the hell?!”

“Don’t ask her how it was,” Annie instructed Ruby.

“Don’t have to. She came back for seconds,” Ruby made a knowing face and looked down.

“Good point,” Annie said as Beth made a disgusted face.

“OK no questions about-- that-- part of it,” Beth turned her hand in a circle in the air.

“OK. I have a question. What were you thinking?” Annie asked.

“How is that any better?” Ruby asked.

“I wasn’t thinking. Exactly,” Beth said as she picked an invisible crumb from her pants. “I was saying goodbye.”

Annie’s face softened at Beth’s tone. “Didn’t work so good, huh?” She asked, not unkindly.

“No, not exactly.” Beth refused to look at the two.

“Wait,” Ruby turned her body fully towards Beth. “When did this happen?”

“That’s your question?!” Annie leaned towards Ruby and turned to Beth. “Don’t answer that.”

“I think it matters when she was trying to say goodbye.”

Beth’s eyes glazed over like she was remembering something. If only poking her sister would be enough, Annie thought. But if she’d tried to end things it meant something had started that was more than just – sex. With gangfriend?!

“When he sent you the body parts,” Annie started. She could almost see the finger lying on Beth’s kitchen island.

Ruby shuddered, and Annie imagined she was remembering it as well. “What did she say?” She turned to Ruby.

Ruby looked back at her quizzically, trying to remember.

“He wants –“ Annie looked down, squinting. “He wants me back!” Annie said triumphantly as Ruby repeated her sentence a second behind her. "Wait. That's what you meant? I thought he wanted you back for business."

"Don't--" Beth raised her finger at Ruby and then at Annie as the latter forced back a smile. To be smiling at a time like this, Annie couldn't believe.

“All the way back then,” Ruby said, her face opening up.

“And then she shot him. Cold,” Annie said.

“Guess it didn’t stick.”

“No, I guess it didn’t.” Beth said coldly.

She hadn’t barely told them what happened that night. Her face was covered and she was grabbed and put in a van, taken to another location. Forced to shoot Turner. Rio came at her and she shot him. She thought he was going to turn the gun at her. She defended herself.

“I can’t believe you held out on us, sis.”

“You didn’t need to know. It didn’t change anything. It was just two times and he can say what he wants, it didn’t mean anything,” Beth assured them. “Ruby’s right. It still got us to where we are.” Beth said, looking behind her, ready to move the car back on the road.

"Must've meant something if you said goodbye to him," Annie knitted her eyebrows together.

"It didn't," Beth said resolutely. "It was goodbye for me. I meant what I said. He just wanted me back for the money. We still owed him, remember?"

That was true, Annie nodded, remembering the rolls of bills that came out of Beth's duffel bag when she'd finally met with gangfriend.

"Some people just shake hands to say goodbye," Annie looked from Ruby to Beth. 

"OK, that's enough--" Beth said, looking to Annie like she was starting to change into shades of pink, though she did look like that when she'd get upset too.

Ruby put out her hand on the steering wheel. “Hold on, hold on.”

“What?” Beth asked.

“Is it going to happen again?”

“I said two questions,” Beth put up two fingers.

“I mean, technically we answered the second question,” Annie looked up. “Good teamwork,” she said to Ruby.

“Thanks,” Ruby said absentmindedly, her eyes on Beth.

“Uh, of course it’s not going to happen again. She’s trying to kill him.” Annie said. “Think she’s going to take a break between the second and third inning?”

Her sister was allowed to make a mistake or two – she supposed. But she had some sense. She had to have some kind of self-preservation. Who was going to be responsible between the two of them? Exactly.

“I don’t know, they seem to get off on that.”

“Can you please talk like I’m here, sitting in front of you?” Beth said, one hand on the steering wheel.

Annie guffawed. Beth didn’t have to say anything. She wouldn’t want to get rid of a man if something was still going on. Beth was right, clearly Fitzpatrick overread what was going on. But still, one question bothered her.

Annie rubbed her cheek as she thought. “Why him?”

Beth barked a laugh. “You sound like--” She shook her head.

“Like who?” Annie asked.

She glanced at Ruby whose eyes flew wide open. “Dean knows?!”

Beth looked away.

“And I wasn’t there to see it?!” Annie banged her hand against Ruby’s shoulder thing. “I take it back. That's the real tragedy here.”

Beth grabbed the papers from Ruby. “I’ll take care of it,” she said again and moved to open the glove compartment in front of Ruby.

“I don’t think cutting him a check is gonna be enough sis.”

“What are you going to do?”

“Talk to him,” Beth said, closing the glove compartment and starting the car. “Hey, isn’t your GED test tomorrow?”

Annie sank in her seat. Her sister wasn’t the only one who could be convincing. She’d figure out a way to push the payment to a later time. She had to. She’d worked so hard for that certificate.

* * *

After dropping off Annie, Beth made her way to Ruby’s place, the two making small talk, Ruby carefully avoiding bringing up anything that was discussed earlier. Beth’s car came to a stop in front of the familiar house.

“If we could just get him alone,” Beth said. “Tied up, maybe we could--” She shook her head. “Get another referral.”

“This guy was sold to us like he was the best.”

“It’s like waiting on tables. Either people eat or they don’t.”

Ruby nodded. “Good point.”

She lifted her handbag to her lap, watching the clasp intently. "What were you saying goodbye to?"

"Don't you start--" 

"B. You can tell your sister that whatever it is that happened didn't mean anything and she might pretend to believe you. She might even believe you. You want to tell me you said goodbye to nothing?"

Usually she'd never try. There wasn't a quicker way to shut her best friend down than asking her a personal question. But that had lingered in her mind since Beth had said it.

Beth didn't disappoint. She exhaled and looked ahead, then away from Ruby out of her window.

“What if you had the gun?” Ruby finally asked, giving up on Beth's answer.

Beth turned her face from Ruby’s house to Ruby. “What?”

“Could you do it?” Ruby asked.

She waited for Beth to glance back at her as she seemed to think over her question. Beth turned her face away. “I’m not a killer,” she said. “I thought I was. I didn’t want to kill him.”

“What happened that night?” Ruby asked gently. She had never asked before. While Beth had shared what happened, she’d kept it to the basics. Even so, if someone had told her her best friend would ever be telling her a story like that-- she’d slam the door in their face.

“I wasn’t going to shoot Turner,” Beth shook her head. “I don’t know what he was thinking but he didn’t give me a choice,” she was struggling to speak, her words coming out like she was swallowing them. “He came at me and I thought that was it. I panicked.” Her voice shook. This part Ruby had heard but when she’d told her and Annie, she’d kept her features straight. Like she’d practiced the shortest version with the fewest details.

“And then I overdid it. I wasn’t thinking anymore.”

Beth’s breathing filled the car. “I shot him three times,” Beth met Ruby’s eyes who held it before Beth looked down at her hands. She squeezed her hands.

Ruby sat, holding Beth’s confession with her. She hadn’t shared that before.

“The first two were probably enough, they were all instinct. He was coming at me. But I-- the third--” she looked towards Ruby but it was like she was talking through her. “Who thinks? Who’s thinking when that goes on? He went down. I stopped thinking. I untied Turner. He told me to give him his gun. And he was on the floor and blood-- he was--” Beth shook her head and gasped like she was out of breathe before slowing down, breathing in and out, slowing down her breathes.

“I left him.” Beth nodded slowly. Her eyes focused on Ruby like she was seeing her in front of her now. “I left him,” she said quietly and her voice broke.

Beth blinked what look like a tear away and her breathing started coming in faster and more sharply as Ruby reached out for her. Beth pulled her hands away. “No, I don’t--”

“B,” Ruby put her hand on Beth’s lap, as she breathed deeply, trying to bring her best friend back to her. “I’m here.” At that Beth let out a small cry but Ruby persisted, turning her palm up and waited. Beth put her hand down, let Ruby hold it for a few moments before taking it away.

The two friends sat in silence, Ruby unwilling to leave.

“I’m OK,” Beth said.

At least her breathing had slowed down. Ruby didn’t know what it was like to believe you killed someone, to him showing up and threatening to kill you. If Beth was able to find comfort in the fact she wasn’t a murderer, a lot more was going on that Ruby didn’t see. The guilt on her face showed Ruby something she hadn’t seen before, something Beth didn’t have to vocalize – that she’d asked herself, even if she had shot him, what would have happened if she’d stayed.

“Did that ever-- I guess I don’t have to ask if you ever talked about it,” Ruby said.

Beth laughed and something in Ruby’s heart broke to hear it. “I couldn't find the right 'sorry I shot you' card at Paper Porcupine.”

Ruby laughed. “I don’t know why I said that. It’s not something you can ever talk with anyone.”

“No,” Beth said wistfully.

“What would you say?” Ruby asked. “I mean, are you sorry? Because you shouldn’t be. You were scared out of your mind. Any one of us would’ve done the same. He would’ve done the same.”

“I don’t know what I’d say," Beth said in a tired voice. "I just want it to be over,” She put her hands on the wheel again.

“But if you could say anything to him?” Ruby pressed.

Beth watched the kids across the street bike down the path. A few cars pass them, a man wave at his neighbor. A sunny day that didn't seem to filter inside the car. 

“I’d say, I was scared. Petrified. I didn’t want to shoot you,” Beth closed her eyes. “You gave me an impossible choice. I was scared.” She opened her eyes. “I am scared,” she said matter-of-factly. “I’m sick of it. I don’t want to be scared anymore.” Her eyes went to Ruby’s.

Ruby refused to leave, not until after she was able to talk with Beth about the kids, about what she was going to do once she got home. Beth insisted on bringing up Fitzpatrick again, assuring Ruby it was going to be dealt with. It had to be. As she walked up the path to her house Ruby’s head swam with the details of her best friend’s revelation.

Beth was sitting in her car as Ruby turned around and waved goodbye to her. As she stepped inside the house and closed the door behind her she looked at her phone. Stan was going to be home later. She couldn’t wait to give him a hug. Whatever was going on, she could always rely on him to hug her back.

They’d have their problems, disagreements, even crises but she wasn’t ever alone. Not for longer than – well. Stan himself seemed to have a taste for it now. Though what was pushing him to get involved with that kind of immoral behavior wasn’t very different than her motivation. Get the best health care for Sara, provide for their family. Secure the best future for them and their kids. Get the respect and treatment that they deserved. Even if she and Stan didn’t see eye to eye at each path they were in it together. It may have taken time but they could talk about everything – for the most part. Even married couples had their secrets.

Putting her handbag down Ruby moved towards her dining room before she turned around and paced to her window. She lifted the curtain and took in Beth, sitting in her car, staring ahead of her in her motionless car.

She wasn’t a jilted lover, Ruby thought, but – she said goodbye to something she couldn't even admit to. And she was sitting there and lying through her teeth. She'd seen Beth's face light up as gang-- Rio'd given her compliments over their brief interactions. Had known Beth took the lead with him, that it meant they'd spent a little more time together. She'd never considered but -- there was more there than Fitzpatrick even knew. She had been seen by him. Who wouldn't want that. But it hadn't taken her best friend to a good place and maybe that's why she didn't want to admit it or talk about it. Since there was obviously more to talk through but – if Beth would want to, she’d always be ready to listen. Yes, for their survival they had to go forward with their plan. She could still say she wished it didn’t have to be this way. A life was still a life. But this was about survival. Them or him.

Ruby closed her eyes. As she woke up beside Stan and stepped into bed with him at the end of the night she felt peace. She wished that with all her heart for her best friend. For Annie too, as bratty as she could be at times. The fact she saved her life, and at the thought Ruby pursed her lips. She was a good kid. Beth had just made so many sacrifices. She deserved peace too.

Beth sat in her car for another minute longer before Ruby saw the car peel off its parking spot and slowly head away. Ruby let go of the curtain and its soft material fell down, covering the cool glass.

**Author's Note:**

> OK, this took an unexpected heavy turn as I originally meant to keep it rather light. But if we’d ever be able to see some more of Beth x Rio being talked about between Beth, Ruby, and Annie I would absolutely want the good, bad, and ugly to be shared. Even if we get it in 2 minutes snippets over 5 episodes, which well, I’d expect anyway.
> 
> And with where we were 3x10 I feel like as much as Beth would hold back it'd be somehow harder for her to confess to nature of her and Rio past re: non relationship relationship compared with the trauma of 2.13.


End file.
